remember me

you wouldn't recognize me.
i have brown hair now.
i have no conscience now.
i have no idea now.
have no purpose now
Failure now.
its much funner when you state the obvious failures.
how far do people need to go to reach satisfaction?
are we ever satisfied? cant you be better then the perfect you already are?

I'm not perfect, nor do i claim to be.
I'm quitefar from it
Although I have stopped trying to grasp that unheard concept
and
mop up that spilled milk.

its much more fun crying.

is this worth it?
will we remember this tomorrow?
Will we leave something here that makes a mark?
or will we just be left contented.

can you find contentedness?
can you feel it?
can you be comfortable not knowing?
Can we just sit around and wonder for 20 minutes beofre we step up and race on to the next twenty moments that are meaningless?

Do you ever think about what you say before you say it?

I don't.
i get into trouble for it.

I trust too easily.
I fall.

I fail.

Sometimesits okay to fail...and suffer the consequences.
its much funner to have your hands fall off

I never thought sleeping was necessary until I forgot how to keep my eyes open.
Do you know how easy it is to forget just to tell yourself you forget once you fall asleep?
to escape from the work from the pain from the alarms from the texts
from him?
from your thoughts that consume the light.
everything need sunlight to live, although I've had far too many days of clouds and rain to be standing up.
I wish i could stop remembering.
i want a blank hard drive.
It's easier just to let go and fall back, but i cant i need to keep walking straight.

I have no one to take my hand and pull me up from this ledge im dangling from.
I iwsh i could put on shades to blind people in this world.

if they cant see me they cant judge me.
I just want to live my life.
cant i just sit down goddammit.
let me sit, give me your chair please, offer me your lap, please.

forgive me, please.
I can't sleep at night without those words.